Self-love Is Not Something You Feel. It’s Something You Do.

These 3 mindset shifts just might change your life

Nina M. Q.

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Photo by Giulia Bertelli on UnsplashI used to do self-love all wrong.

I used to do self-love all wrong.

Like many people, I interpreted the term self-love as a feeling. A feeling of “loving oneself.”

This, I guess, is the same mistake people often to do in relationships.

They tell each other they love each other. And often, that is true, in the sense that they feel love for each other.

But the million-dollar question that will make or break the relationship is if they treat each other in a loving way.

Because, what good is a feeling if it’s not followed by coherent action?

The same goes for the relationship we have with ourselves.

It’s not always how we feel that is most important. The actions we take can override the feeling.

We cannot control our feelings. But we can control our actions.

It’s not possible to just decide to feel a certain way. It’s not possible to decide that “from now on, I love myself.”

But what is possible is deciding to act in a certain way.

It is possible to decide that “from now on, I will treat myself in a loving way.”

And guess what happens when you’re treated in a loving way?

You start feeling loved.

You start feeling nurtured, you start feeling accepted, and you start feeling like you are enough.

The three following mindset shifts will set you on the path to true self-love.

#1 Focus on what you need, not what you want

This one really comes down to being completely transparent and honest with yourself.

You don’t lie to someone you love. So don’t lie to yourself.

Do you know the difference between a real friend and an acquaintance? A real friend will tell you the brutal truths when you need them. Even if they’re uncomfortable. Even if they hurt.

You need to give yourself the gift of honesty because only then will you be able to live your life in an

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